|the naive rebel|
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xxxiv| Talk it out
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word count- 2025

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INAAYAT
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Everything is abnormal. I look at the bright sky over and then at the green mess below me. Leaning on the terrace's edge wall, I look at the students moving from the hostel to the college building in rush and hurry.

I, on the other hand just admire the clear blue mess with my blue tints. No contacts today, no Aayat. Just the plain old Inaayat. The reason I wasn't rushing along them is that I had decided to bunk today. The lectures are just for a namesake as everyone is busy with the preparations for the upcoming event.

I see students scattered outside the college's gate. Their chattering scares away the small birds chirping and flying freely. The clouds cover the brightness of the sun, the weather is less humid and thus preparing for the onset of October heat. It doesn't generally rain in September, which prepones the October heat. Next week marks the last one in August, which also depicts that we are heading towards the new semester.

I gaze at the tiny beings, their black heads moving as they joke with glee. The garden area is being converted to ensure the buffet facility, tent work is going to start soon.

The only fact that comes to my mind seeing these students is that one of them is the person, whom we are in search of. The person can be anyone. Anyone. Maybe someone I know, maybe some whom we have never met. It's all jumbled up and confusing.

It's Friday, today which means the event is scheduled for the upcoming Wednesday. A week since Ishaan and I found the files, a week since he has brutally ignored me. It isn't that he didn't talk to me while we discussed our further plan or something like that. The last couple of days, we were so caught up in our responsibilities for the event that we hadn't discussed anything.

But, the usual glint, the playfulness he held while passing some sarcastic comments on my clumsiness had stopped. He had switched back to the Shaan mode, ignorant and silent.

I have been pressuring my brain to remember the incident where I must have done something wrong or said something wrong but I couldn't remember any. I had messaged him, even. Asking him to meet me but the only reply I received was with him telling me that he is busy.

It is weird to see him in his Shaan avatar, again when I had gotten so used to his real self.

Sighing, I look down at my phone pepping myself up to dial the number I am scared to call.

It rings, as my heart starts palpitating.

"Hey." The cheery voice greets me and my eyes shut.

"Hi, Ditu. How are you?" I say back softly.

"I am fine, Inu. Are you okay? Is everything fine?" She starts panicking.

"I am perfect Ditu."

"You aren't usually able to call on weekdays...I thought maybe you are-" Her voice is wrapped in worry and scare.

A smile makes its way on my face as her voice calms my anxiety.

"I wanted to tell you something, though." She hums asking me to continue.

"There's an event in the college..on Wednesday," I tell her quickly, waiting for her wrath.

"Wait. This Wednesday? You mean on Rakhi?" My brooding silence answers the question as I hear her frustratingly face-palming herself.

"You promised me." Her voice is slow and angry and maybe defeated.

"I did promise. That's why I wanted to ask, would it be fine if we keep the ceremony at evening? I'll try leaving the event mid-way, around 4ish- will be there by 8 maximum." I pause before continuing, "You have no idea how badly I want to meet you and Ma.." I trail off, gulping the brimming tears.

"Just come. I don't care what time, I want to see you, Inu. I want to."

"I'll be there, promise." And I mean it.

"I know. Also, tell me."

"What?" I question at her sudden change in the sentence.

"What is bothering you?"

"Ah-what do you mean?"

"I have known you since forever. Now cut the crap off, and tell me what is it that's bothering you?"

I contemplate my options, is it even that big of a problem that I am sounding off? Why is it bothering me so much, when I can just simply choose to not care? It's his choice, and I do remember that there's nothing I could have done to possibly piss him off.

"Inu?" Her voice brings me back to the call as I take a deep breath while I narrate the recent incidents.

"Why do you think that he is ignoring you?"

"I don't know...I just think he is. It's not that we talk a lot, but recently it's different than usual. He is back to the mute zone, and it's.."

"The only way you can find the reason is by asking him."

"I tried, but he claimed to be busy." I scoff. I know problems don't solve by their own, we have to take efforts and I was ready to take those efforts but I can't force him to talk.

"Hmm, give it some more days and then try again, maybe?" She suggests and I agree.

"Also." She pauses dramatically and I bite my tongue waiting for some exaggerated dialogue to leave her mouth.

"Why is it bothering you so much?" She drops and I know, that I have no answer for her question.

It's true, why is it bothering me so much. I have known him for roughly four months, and it shouldn't hurt the way it does. Contrary, the equation I share with my other friends is going stronger than before.

I have been recently helping Nikhil in his job applications, and - okay. I understand.

"I don't know Ditu. I guess I'll let things happen the way they are happening currently. By the way, don't forget to inform Ma about my arrival-tell her to prepare all my favourite dishes. I am legit craving her food." I enthusiastically tell her.

"Will do. Take Care, ha?"

"You too. Bye, love you."

"Love you right back."

I close my eyes remembering the incident where I had told Ishaan about Nikhil's message. I realise that his ignorance is his disappointment, he must have assumed that I am not focussing on the case and the real target but helping Nikhil with his work. With me writing his applications, a seed of doubt could arise about how a Science student is so well-versed with such patterns and stuff.

Maybe he is just worried that I can blow off our cover?

Deciding that I have to clear off his doubt, and also that I have to end this case soon or else I would surely lose my remanent brain cells. I message him.

'Sunday, club? Incase the drug gang is present?'

I start moving towards my room as I send him the text message. Clicking my phone off, without waiting for his reply.

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"Angel, wasn't it shocking for you to see Shaan talk?" Sameer questions as I roll my eyes at him. We are at the library after Sameer's lectures were over.

While I am reading a random book from M&B's collection, Sameer is busy completing his assignments.

"You have no idea." I chuckle remembering how I had found out about him being Ishaan.

"When I see him at the lectures being all quite, the images of him being all rude and sarcastic pops up in front of my eyes." He rants horrified.

"Don't worry, you'll get used to him. Thank your luck that you haven't seen him swearing yet-"

"WAIT, he swears?" The look on his face is so amusing that I break into laughter -in the library. After the stern shushing from the librarian, I bite my lips trying to hold back the chortle.

"Hey." I raise my head at the new voice, finding a nervous Nikhil running towards me.

"Shh." I angrily repeat dreading another glare from the librarian. I can't spoil my reputation for these non-book-loving monkeys.

"I need your help." He whisper-yells, completely tensed.

Sameer looks at him confused and then at me curiously.

"A new agency reached out to me after the application, they need certain portfolios and a more comprehensive CV, before signing me." He informs in a single breath.

"Hey, that's so good! Just one step away." I congratulate him."But there's a problem." He pops the bubble of excitement.

"I don't have a good range of portfolios to send them."

"I can only help you draft a perfect CV, photography and I don't go well. I'll end up breaking the camera and then my bones." I confess.

Don't question how. If I can slip on a straight (with no bumps or lumps or even rocks) road and hurt my knees and palms and elbows and ankle, this is something I can do.

"If you don't mind, I can help you with that." Sameer intervenes and Nikhil gladly accepts his help.

"Oof, I hope everything goes well." Nikhil wishes hopefully. "Aayat, do you have a laptop? I have no idea why but mine has stopped working." He asks and I nod my head as I get up from my chair.

"I'll just go and bring it here," I tell him.

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THIRD PERSON
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Ten minutes pass as Sameer and Nikhil sit there surfing through the books that Aayat had piled up on the table.

"How does she even read so many books?" Nikhil exasperatedly asks.

"Hobby, I guess." Sameer nervously voices.

"Hmm.." Nikhil replies as his phone rings. Shocked at the caller's name he looks at Sameer before picking the phone up.

"Hey."

"Hi. Where are you?" Shaan's voice rings through the phone. Nikhil had decided to surprise Shaan with his acceptance mail. Shaan had helped Nikhil work towards his dream, pushed him and held him whenever he felt low and weak.

He has been so grateful to Shaan and had wanted to give him this surprise, the sole reason he was taking Sameer's help for the portfolio. He knew Shaan could readily and easily help him.

"Library," Nikhil says and realises how weird it is to answer his place of presence as a freaking library.

He and studies never go together, leave alone a library.

"What?" Shaan's surprised voice doesn't bother Nikhil as he chuckles.

The very moment Aayat enters the library with her laptop bag and sits at her original seat.

Unzipping her laptop bag, she pushes the laptop towards Nikhil.

"Yea, I'm with Aayat. I'll call you later, is there something urgent?" He asks quickly.

"No. Nothing. Will talk later. Bye." And with that, the phone goes off. Nikhil fails to notice the sudden change in Ishaan's tone as he opens Aayat's laptop.

"So, Miss. Inaayat."

•
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nonetheless,
take care!
Until the next,
Keep dodging the bullets,
ऊ.