|the naive rebel|

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i| over a cup of coffee

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INAAYAT

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'and they live happily ever after.'

With that line, I close the paperback shut keeping it aside on my bed stand and lie back on my soft comfortable bed, snuggling into my favourite pillow.

The ceiling suddenly appears interesting, as it displays all my life's stills before me. One after the other, reminding me of the day's happenings.

An adult at mind, but I still believe in fantasies. In Fairy-tales, in happy endings. Every book I read, I always search for a beautiful and meaningful ending because no matter how sad or happy the ending is, it should have a meaning. That ties all the loose strings, in the end, making the story complete.

Growing up in a science-oriented family but choosing a stream in Humanities and then continuing to pursue Literature, wasn't a jovial decision for my family. But, I cherish it.

Being a black sheep in your family isn't an optimistic scenario but I have learnt to grow and evolve with it.

I have learnt to own up to my choices and yet I sometimes wish that my family had progressive thinking towards career streams. Not every child wants to become an Engineer or a Doctor, and that's still normal.

The fan over me rotates cooing me to sleep when there's a rasp knock at my door. My half-closed eyes, open up with a jolt, muttering a low but audible 'come in' I sit back, resting on my bed's headboard.

The door scraps open and my father enters the room. His steps are measured and slow, he appears to be thinking something so deeply. Closing the door behind him, he comes towards my bed and comfortably sits right before me.

The room's silent, making the wheels turning in his head seem audible enough for me to sense. I suddenly notice my favourite mug in his right hand, which he easily pushes towards me.

The sweet-bitter scent of coffee spreads around the room, the warmth seeps through the glass cup managing to mellow down my soul. The unsweetened coffee hits pleasingly on my taste buds while I wait for my father to explain his reason behind the bribery.

He seems so troubled that evokes a feeling of confusion and fear within me. Normally, he is more outspoken and doesn't filter his words before speaking. Being a cop, he is assigned duties in the crime department and has learnt to be clear and sharp with his words.

Taraj Kapoor, my father seems tongue-tied for the first time in his life and it isn't a good sign. I can feel my heart starting to palpitate but I refrain from voicing anything. I wait for him to speak, to explain and meanwhile, I just devour my coffee.

"I want you to join an Engineering college." His tone though mild strikes my eardrums like a horrifying thunderbolt.  I raise my eyes to meet his but he is already looking at me intently.

We have had these conversations many times since I joined my University. He had tried to coax me into joining the science field ever since my high school teachers commented about my good academics graph.

It hurts when I have to repeat my elucidation again and again like a broken record system. I don't have to compulsorily join a science field to prove my strong academic background. Career stream should be a choice and not an obligation.

"Dad." I sigh, straightening my back as I prepare myself to speak.

"No. I didn't mean that." He corrects me and stops my thoughts from being misdirected. He takes a deep breath and continues to tell me the reason behind his statement.

My father works in the Central Agency of Investigation in Mumbai, being the director of his department he is majorly involved in the crimes relating to homicides and theft.

He tells me about a college in Pune which is known for its notable alumni and high education standards. Not many are aware but the same college is also famous for a thing other than its academics and that is for the repetitive suicide cases that have taken place over there.

He says that even though those deaths were recorded as suicides the police departments in Pune believe them to have a different story. A theory that involves murders and a psychopath.

Five students have lost their lives in the past five years and to stop this matter from exceeding and taking any more precious lives, these cases are now transferred to my father's agency.

"We are still not sure about those deaths being murders but we have to find out the reality behind the dizzy fog of lies. A cop won't ever be able to enter the college and investigate this matter. We need a citizen to do that." His eyes have an unusual glint in them.

I have never seen my dad be so excited over a case, even now when he looks constricted I certainly am sure that he is enjoying the thrill this case brings with it.

"I want you to go and pose as a normal student there. Our department cannot trust any random citizen and if you go, it would certainly make our sources and connection with the truth even stronger."

He explains about how they needed a student to go undercover and my sister's chances were ruled out because she has visited the same college the previous year for a competition. It sounds so surreal and weird to know that these things exist in real life.

A Hollywood spy drama coming to life.

There was a second where I wanted to laugh my guts out but the keenness on his face and the eagerness that reflects through his words stop me. Going to a different college would mean taking a year drop in my literature course and with my final year almost edging closer to its end. It makes me want to exit this brewing plan even before it commences.

He is waiting for my answer, a reply and hoping for it to be a positive one but I am gripped in confusion. It sounds bad, everything about this plan screams destruction and still, I nod my head in affirmation.

The only reason behind my answer is to gain their acceptance towards me and my field. Maybe, if I agree to do this task, they would start respecting my choices. Happily embrace my stream and be proud of whoever I am growing up to be.

Hoping that one day, the disappointment they had felt when I chose Humanities over Science would eventually fade away. I have lived my past two years in the guilt of not being able to make my parents feel proud of me. I want to mollify their pent up dissatisfaction and make them aware that stereotyping career fields have ended long back.

I am possibly a wrong choice for this setup but I would still try my level best to help my father, and be able to prove myself before them.

The thought of being surrounded with numbers and equations and derivations has already started to give me a fresh stream of jitters.

But, the smile my dad directs towards me manages to erase all my doubts and fears. Emancipating me from all the negative thoughts and prepares me for the new unexpected challenge that stands before me.   

If everything goes right, I'll be back my home, to my field and my family in a blink of an eye.

• • •

Hey! I hope you all are liked the chapter. Please do share your reviews.

till then,

keep dodging the bullets,

ऊ.